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She didn't even get to his sexy backstory!
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Descriptive Text

by Robin Brooks on May 1, 2017 at 12:00 am
Chapter: The More Things Change
└ Tags: comic, keran, roleplaying
Comments RSS

Discussion (23) ¬

  1. Ilmaaate
    Ilmaaate
    May 1, 2017, 12:33 am | # | Reply

    noooo
    The worst person

  2. Drakefire
    Drakefire
    May 1, 2017, 12:45 am | # | Reply

    Nope.

    So much nope.

  3. Say it in Black Saturn's voice
    Say it in Black Saturn's voice
    May 1, 2017, 1:01 am | # | Reply

    His sexy backstory:
    One cold night a noble family went out too see a play with their young child and as they exited through the abandoned alley a robber approached with a repeating crowbow. And he pulled the trigger.
    And that’s when I stepped in, caught the arrow in mid air, and used my mad Jujitsu skills on him. “You don’t want to -cross- me.”
    “Oh thank you sexy stranger” cried the wife as she started making out with me. It was super hot. “Stop kissing my wife you scoundrel, I shall have you killed for that” cried the husband. The next day he put a hit out on me. Ever since I have been on the run, blending in with the darkness, forced to do mercenary work just to survive. Sexy mercenary work. But not like, prostitution, like, the cool sexy mercenary work.

  4. linkstormshadow
    linkstormshadow
    May 1, 2017, 2:50 am | # | Reply

    So much nope it induces vomit.

  5. Alcarna
    Alcarna
    May 1, 2017, 2:59 am | # | Reply

    I would be careful with the puking – for all we know, he’s into that.

  6. Robert
    Robert
    May 1, 2017, 3:13 am | # | Reply

    Let us finish that last line: You feel as if you must instruct him in the proper manner of attire while beating him with a loaf of oddly tough stale bread, rewrite his profile in the proper markup of ‘Yuck!’, and ensure the entirety of this is recorded so that the GMs can applaud your discretion in the matter… because in this case that is discrete.

    Alternatively, you note you have a hot friend and poke Castor.

    • Ilmaaate
      Ilmaaate
      May 1, 2017, 4:10 am | # | Reply

      Good Lord yes. Get Castor on him. Make him regret the day he wrote that description.

      • Dallys
        Dallys
        May 1, 2017, 11:07 pm | # | Reply

        I don’t think it’s a good idea to set a precedent for weaponizing Castor

        • Robert
          Robert
          May 2, 2017, 12:17 pm | # | Reply

          … of course it is!

  7. Strish
    Strish
    May 1, 2017, 5:32 am | # | Reply

    Jeorge? Thats a name I haven’t heard before. Neat.

  8. Ibi
    Ibi
    May 1, 2017, 7:26 am | # | Reply

    Last panel after reading last sentence: My sentiments exactly.

  9. mbuhtz
    mbuhtz
    May 1, 2017, 8:00 am | # | Reply

    You can make $1.99/novella on Amazon for stuff like that. His calling is surely elsewhere.

  10. tremor3258
    tremor3258
    May 1, 2017, 9:02 am | # | Reply

    I’m just glad the profile was cut off when it did. So much no.

  11. Orbe
    Orbe
    May 1, 2017, 11:02 am | # | Reply

    What really bothers me is the second person writing, thus forcing the reader to “feel” what the writer demands.

  12. Cuthbert
    Cuthbert
    May 1, 2017, 12:15 pm | # | Reply

    Yeeees!

    A million times yes!

    I have so much in common with her. I like all the different parts of the game, but I’m in it for the roleplay. At least in WoW there are dedicated areas for that kind of stuff. Hey, no judgement, do what you like in your private time. I -do- judge when you post things in your public profile. Like so many people are into the weirdest fetishes, and just post ‘my back tentacles stretch into the front of my pants and when you see me smirking you feel…’ like throwing up. Yup.

    Now I recently started playing FFXIV with my best friend.

    So different.

    And when I mentioned looking for an rp guild (free company) … A hundred Miqo’te wanted to buy me a drink.

    Ack!

    • Orbe
      Orbe
      May 1, 2017, 7:36 pm | # | Reply

      In the SA forums there’s a thread that makes it a point to collect all the horrible RP profiles.

      Like the one about the worgen DK with a dead baby impaled in its dangly parts. That one was a rollercoaster.

      • Soegra
        Soegra
        May 2, 2017, 4:45 pm | # | Reply

        May I request a link to this said thread??? I’m curious lol

  13. Arugadh Stonereaver
    Arugadh Stonereaver
    May 1, 2017, 3:58 pm | # | Reply

    It sounds like the guy’s copying the text from the latest WoW in-game “romance” books (those grey items that drop on occasion, which are innuendo-laden romance fodder.)

  14. Taarax
    Taarax
    May 1, 2017, 4:27 pm | # | Reply

    Should just venture over to “Warcraft Sues” if you want a taste of what an 18+ RP section would look like hueheuheuhuehue

  15. Olania
    Olania
    May 2, 2017, 1:17 am | # | Reply

    I wonder if there’s a Failzeroth equivalent for RoQ? This qualifies.

  16. Dalairen
    Dalairen
    May 2, 2017, 3:03 am | # | Reply

    – It’s olden bikini time!
    – No, Jeorge! NO!

    • Dalairen
      Dalairen
      May 2, 2017, 3:06 am | # | Reply

      Golden, dammit. My kbd is a whacka.

  17. Greyheart
    Greyheart
    May 2, 2017, 8:45 am | # | Reply

    Ugh, this hurt my eyes to read. How DARE you, Robin!

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